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Smoke and Foam (No Mirrors)
Moving here, there and everywhere.
It’s almost Thanksgiving, which may include staying at home and awaiting a Noah’s Ark variety of family members (and their pets) showing up or bravely traveling away from home for a short holiday vacation. Either way, relaxation will inevitably be intercepted by stress at certain points the next few days and it’s important to anticipate this predictable chaos. There’s no magic escape to this reality. It could be cooking the turkey, parking everybody’s cars to comply with local laws, keeping screaming children quiet or ensuring the dinner conversation remains lighthearted and friendly (unless you’re celebrating Festivus). This way, whatever does arise out of nowhere can be resolved with the greatest demonstration of tranquil multitasking anybody has ever seen.
Well, second best…
Here’s to trying Kramer’s bar magic this holiday (sniff, sniff – if you know what I’m saying).
That ’80s Thanksgiving
Spoiler Alert: Content in this blog is from the November 19, 2014 episode of The Goldbergs
Duck hunting + Jazzercise + a martini for Pops = Thanksgiving
The Goldbergs celebrate Thanksgiving like most families in America, which includes every color combination of spandex, an unrivaled Power Glove and the desire to gravitate towards the people and things we truly are thankful for. So, fittingly, there’s plenty of chaos, turmoil and hilarity.
“By 9:00 a.m. we’ll be elbow deep in a 20 lb. Butterball!”
Erica insists/flat-out tells her mom Beverly that she doesn’t want anything to do with a Goldbergs Thanksgiving and that she plans to spend the day at her friend Lainey’s house. This causes a glorious overreaction from the Jazzercising Beverly, which results in fantastic mother-daughter battles for the heart of Thanksgiving.
Aside from the main characters, Uncle Marvin is a wonderful dynamic in this sitcom paradise and impressionable Adam is his excited protégé. Perhaps blinded by the futuristic technology known as “the beeper,” Adam and Barry are mesmerized by the coolness of their uncle who just randomly stops by in his DeLorean (yes, the inspiration for the time machine), but his shared interests in classic ’80s movies, the Nintendo gaming system and its powerful glove thrilled Adam to his core. In fact, the aforementioned Power Glove was a gift from Uncle Marvin! Adam finally had a partner in-crime/agent for his national video game domination.
The Nintendo Power Glove: “Everything else is child’s play”
Seeing the remarkable connection between his youngest son and his uncle, Murray (with guidance from Pops) chose to show interest in Adam’s favorite activity at that moment: video games. Unfortunately, age recommendations are marked for a reason on technology like Nintendo, especially for people who don’t pause first before looking/slamming for the pause button. Sadly, in this situation, the essential wires in the Power Glove got the harshest of beat downs. That is, until Barry put it on and stuck it up a turkey’s ass while preparing the delicious bird for dinner.
Barry never disappoints.
Despite this tragedy, what hurt Adam more than his unusable Power Glove was the fact that his dad Murray didn’t understand the reason why he loved hanging out with his Uncle Marvin so much. Adam admired Uncle Marvin because, unlike everybody else, he understood him. He didn’t make fun of him or belittle his favorite things. He spoke his language of dreaming amazingly big, making the impossible possible, all with a contagiously wild imagination.
This got Murray thinking. It was time for a power nap.
Even after Erica survived a Marine’s Jazzercise session and the most illegal/entertaining speed walking race in history, Pops (there he is again…) let her in on a little secret about her mom and his late wife that involved family recipes and a special connection in age when being introduced to the hectic universe of preparing Thanksgiving dinner with one’s mother. So, like a Goldberg, after exhausting every fiber of her being to refuse some ridiculous activity with her family, Erica finally used those precious beats in her heart as the deciding votes.
Dinner will be served: Goldbergs style.
Eventually, Murray came to see that video games were not really just about the games, but instead about connecting with his son. The result was a father and son spending the afternoon shooting ducks…on Nintendo (Shout out to “Duck Hunt!”). But a dad playing video games with his son is something I can relate to. When I was Adam’s age, my dad also played sports video games with me. This experience was great because he showed an enthusiastic interest in something I really enjoyed. And, just like Adam and Murray, a couple buttons always seemed to break when our fathers played these video games together, but it was definitely worth it.
After all the craziness of that day from cooking a perfect Thanksgiving dinner, Beverly and Erica expressed their bonding experience in the kitchen like something straight out of a Hallmark card:
“We kicked Thanksgiving’s ass!”
Yes you did Goldbergs, yes you did…
And, if you’re like me, when you think of Thanksgiving and family, John Parr, a “man in motion” and St. Elmo’s Fire immediately comes to mind (it did for show creator Adam F. Goldberg)
I’m thankful for The Goldbergs (and my family too!)
The Game of Life
Spoiler Alert: The following contains content from the November 12, 2014 episode of The Goldbergs
As determined as a ‘hungry, hungry hippo’ and as energetic as a teenage girl hanging-out with her friends talking, Barry Goldberg’s mission towards gaming superiority still may be stuck in the impossible.
Trivial Pursuit is the game and sister Erica his brainy nemesis. Honestly, knowing the author of “The Diary of Anne Frank” is tricky. Anyone could have missed that one…and by anyone, I mean only one: Barry Goldberg. Without the help of the JTP, he was left stranded on an island in the form of a kitchen table chair with nothing but his Big Tasty raps, ka-ra-tay moves and his confused concept of what sitting down means. Nostalgic board game nirvana aside, Barry’s only hope to defeat Erica for title of the smartest person in the world/between the two of them would require a measured approach to studying and preparation.
“I will do everything in my power to learn knowledge!”
While this intellectual battle between siblings brewed at the Goldergs’ kitchen table (under the careful supervision of bathroom break prone Pops), youngest child Adam was facing a ball of a time in gym class…literally. Red, rubber balls to be precise. The most gladiator-like gym class activity, dodge ball, is the pinnacle of survival for any young boy and girl.
True story.
After hearing about such a “barbaric” game, Beverly went into Beverly-mode: yes, Beverly Goldberg got dodge ball cancelled. But after a special isolation exercise by Mr. Mellor focused on Adam, the youngest Goldberg was struck square in the face with one of these balls of life. It left a red mark, which matched the fury of mama Beverly. We all know what happened next, following a slow-motion, fear-driven stroll through the halls of William Penn Academy. Beverly Goldberg not only cancelled dodge ball, but she also got Mr. Mellor fired.
It just got real…entertaining.
After Murray relieved Mr. Mellor from his inaccurate curb address number painting gig (“where’s the 3?”) and enlisting him to help him at his work, the uber-competitive gym teacher proved too intense for his laid-back job in the furniture store (self-high five). Plus, there were just too many bananas…way too many bananas in one drink.
Had Beverly gone too far?
Of course she did, that’s not even a serious question. But it was in the funniest way possible. Still, a gym teacher belongs in a gym, torturing young children with life lessons and sports cliches, rope climbs and world-class dodging. And sometimes that gym teacher who still doesn’t know your last name is pushing you so hard because he wants to instill some relentless toughness in you, preparing you to dodge life’s many unpredictable challenges that not even the all-powerful Beverly can deflect.
And after Erica beat Barry at his own game (literally, he made a game called, “Barrynopoly”), Barry was not only deflated about his surprising defeat, but he candidly disclosed his intellectual limitations to his older sister Erica.
It just got real…for real.
Contests and debates between siblings reveal a special bond, one that extends beyond normal competitive jousting. There’s an uncensored ruthlessness, all in good fun, with added realizations of what’s really at stake. Just don’t say the words, “Chinese checkers” around a particular sister of mine…But just as Erica cheated to ensure Barry got his much-needed victory at Trivial Pursuit (questions from the “junior edition” were discreetly used), so do all of us with siblings to one extent or another. This may include an older sister finally giving in and seeing and laughing at a movie in the theater she had previously refused to admit she enjoyed, just to spend some quality time with her younger brother and validate his choice in comedy. Or this may include going easy on a younger brother during a complex card game, to give him a much-needed win after a stressful week (then my oldest sister crushed me 3 times in a row, but still).
Even a gaming warrior needs to show some heart every once in a while. A true warrior is not only physically and intellectually formidable, but this person is also fully aware of his or her surroundings:
Like a 1980s music video, a warrior also knows how to take it over-the-top for the win!
Happy Monday!
‘Tis no secret that penguins are beloved birds. They are cute, surprisingly graceful in their wobbliness, majestic in water and always dressed to the nines. While Thanksgiving has yet to occur, and some may even grimace at the very mention of Christmas in early November, the television commercial below is really something special.
Department store John Lewis for the win.
Try to see the world a little different this week!
Jimmy's Daily Planet 