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This Just Popped in My Head (& Microwave)

The day has finally arrived….

It’s National Popcorn Day!

As a lifelong popcorn eater, this holiday (well, it really should be) rises high on the list of the non-major celebratory occasions during the year. Whether served hot with movie theater-style butter and a sprinkle of salt or a complex combination of seasonings, popcorn is simply the best snack food. However, there are a few things that I don’t even know about this magical food.

It’s time to get schooled (but in a good way).

Fact #11: I still hate to share popcorn.

Harsh? Perhaps. And yes, this is the same snack food that is one of the lowest cost and most accessible on the market.

But popcorn is literally that delicious.

In a World…

In a world, where people can, for a short time, jump/hop several feet in the air without being held down by the restraints of gravity, what snack will skyrocket in demand to become the most popular type of food?

Obviously, the answer is ready-to-eat butterscotch popcorn.

In a world, where people can temporarily jump/hop several feet in the air without being held down by the restraints of gravity, they need to consume something made with butterscotch. If and once they do, they will successfully simulate the true meaning behind “hopscotching” with an incomparable freedom. As a result of the immense popularity of butterscotch and its magical powers, the market explodes in demand. Butterscotch popcorn, cookies, brownies, pie, pudding, sauce, candy, ice cream and liquor start to dominate the food and beverage/frozen items industry with record sales. Ready-to-eat popcorn has recently been soaring (yes, I went there) in popularity. Accordingly, the combination of the temporary flying power of butterscotch with the popularity of popcorn has predictably elevated ready-to-eat butterscotch popcorn to the alpha position of food items for the people of the world to enjoy.

P.S. Stay Safe this Friday the 13th!

You’ve Never Seen a Turkey Fly Like This Before

As a nervous “chef” whose primary fear in the kitchen is under-cooking meat and fish, I am always looking for easy tricks of the trade. The one food item I never ruin is one that should become its own food group in the ever-famous Food Pyramid: popcorn. My eternal love for this snack of all snacks is…well, no time for that right now.

The recipe below was given to me with Thanksgiving on the horizon. The author certainly solved the rubik’s cube of every feast which is, of course, how to prepare and cook the turkey. Nobody wants to repeat what happened in “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation.”

Below is the aforementioned recipe from an unknown source on how to successfully cook a turkey.

Enjoy and Good Luck!

“TURKEY RECIPE

I thought this sounded good! Here is a turkey recipe that also includes the use of popcorn as a stuffing ingredient — imagine that!
When I found this recipe, I thought it was perfect for people like me, who just are not sure how to tell when turkey is thoroughly cooked, but not dried out.

Give this a try:

8-15 lb. turkey
1 cup melted butter
1 cup stuffing (Pepperidge Farm is Good)
1 cup un-popped popcorn (ORVILLE REDENBACHER’S LOW FAT IS BEST)
Salt/pepper to taste

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Brush turkey with melted butter, salt and pepper.
Fill cavity with stuffing and popcorn.
Place in baking pan making sure the neck end is toward the front of the oven, not the back.
After about 4 hours, listen for the popping sounds.
When the turkey’s ass blows the oven door open and the bird flies across the room…it’s done.
(And you thought I didn’t cook…)

Happy Thanksgiving!!