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Starlight’s Goldberg Express
Spoiler Alert: This post contains content from the October 1, 2014 episode of The Goldbergs:
“Jesus Christ Superstar” is a famous play with the most divine leading man. As a matter of fact, what has every person who has played the part of Jesus said immediately after hearing the good news (likely on a Friday)?
“Jesus Christ, are you kidding me!”
Anyways, Beverly’s most delicious snuggle monster Adam gave a spirited audition to play Jesus in the school play, but, sadly, it wasn’t enough. Instead, the part went to Data Dave Kim. Consequently, when Adam and girlfriend Dana Caldwell checked “the board” for the assigned parts, Adam’s finger devastatingly had to scroll onto the dreaded second page/second string of performers to discover his new role (literally).
“Sometimes, you just gotta be Todd the Apostle.”
Too distraught to properly congratulate Dana on getting assigned to play Mary, Adam went biblical to seek guidance from the only person who could help him in this tragic situation: His Smother. This led to a contentious meeting with the principal (who owed Beverly for introducing he and his wife years earlier…) and the casting director/director of “Jesus Christ Superstar.” In true Goldberg fashion, Beverly utilized some verbal jiu-jitsu to allow a second, rival play to open.
And would this be a second showing of “Jesus Christ Superstar” with a new cast? Well, let’s put it another way: what would make that play even better? Try adding skates and a killer disco soundtrack…
Yes, Adam was the new lead in a school production of Andrew Lloyd Webber’s “Starlight Express!”
For anyone who has seen “Starlight Express,” all the characters sing, act and roller skate in perfect harmony. Yes, it’s just mildly ambitious for kids in middle school to master such skills in about a week or so. Enter the laughs!
Now, this part of the plot was personally satisfying because when I was around Adam’s age, I actually saw “Starlight Express” in Las Vegas with my family! The music, the flashing lights, the roller skating and the story was unforgettably fantastic. It was one of the coolest things I had ever seen and heard in my life. During the episode, Beverly bribes her daughter Erica to play the female lead and “thunder mama” herself served as the skating choreographer. While the rehearsing for “Starlight Express” was a disaster, the comedy was gold (as you’d expect). Unfortunately, Adam got too involved and too intense and a competitive streak developed with the rival play co-starring his girlfriend Dana. Eventually, both Adam and his mom came to their senses, conceded to the reality of “the board” and her precious angel returned to his supporting role as a made up apostle to Jesus.
As you do.
While the secondary storyline of this episode featured Barry and Murray leaving hockey games early to beat traffic, the storyline with “Starlight Express” between a loving mother and her baby boy rang especially true for this writer. It reminded me how a mom and her young son can genuinely relate and bond over a disco musical with roller skating while that boy is at that awkward age of not wanting to hang out with his parents. Thankfully, like Beverly, my mom was (and is still) willing to be goofy and silly with her son to spend time beyond just helping with homework and going clothes shopping.
I’d like to say more, but I don’t think I could do it as well as others:
The Goldbergs continue to show “there’s a light at the end of the tunnel” with family.
Mixing ID’s
Spoiler Alert: This post contains details from the season 2 premiere of The Goldbergs:
“Pick a name”
“James Bond”
“Taken”
“Barry Bonds”
“Also taken”
“Barry Goldberg”
“That’s your name!”
“Erica Goldberg”
“That is my name!”
Now that television’s “summer break” is officially over, families like The Goldbergs have re-entered our lives with their perfectly placed ’80s references (a Lost Boys t-shirt anyone?), along with their all too familiar bickering between siblings and between siblings and parents. Of course, nothing seems to pull a family closer together than the dedicated art of a mixture tape.
(FYI: Mixture Tape = Mix Tape)
Let the awkward hilarity rejoice and begin anew in the suburbs of Philadelphia in 1980-something!
When young Adam had his first crush, feelings of love, excitement and nervousness seemed to paralyze him from communicating anything to Dana Caldwell beyond asking her if she wanted to poke a snake with a stick after school. Enter the glorious relationship gift called the “mix tape.” It was a certified gold gesture from the days of analog technology and the card game Uno. This way, Adam could let famous musicians express his true feelings for Dana instead of him.
Genius.
The only problem was that Adam left his romantic prize laying out for the one and only sMother (aka-his mom Beverly) to find it who obviously assumed it was meant for her. This led to the most delicious pancakes ever, Boo-Berry cereal and the public declaration that he was her favorite child…in front of her other two children.
Nothing could go wrong, right?
Meanwhile, Erica was teaching Barry how to obtain the coveted Fake ID. Naturally, with Barry involved, it led to one of the most amusing failed experiences of all-time. Plus, add in David Spade as the willing photo hut employee (for a double sitcom reunion, mind you) and you knew the laughs were coming. Please see the opening dialogue for a glimpse into this comedic exchange.
As Beverly convinced herself the mix tape was a loving tribute to her from her snuggle monster, this threw Adam’s universe into a tailspin. This relationship volcano erupted when Beverly gave Adam and his appreciative girlfriend Dana a ride home from a laser show. Beverly then proceeded to play “her” mix tape in the car and sing the title track, Chicago’s “You’re the Inspiration.”
Yes, this happened. And then questions were asked from every direction.
Whose mix tape was it? Did Adam make the same mix tape for his girlfriend and his mom? Who was Adam’s true inspiration?
Some of you may even be asking, “what’s a mix tape?”
Bottom line: This created a disastrous conundrum for Adam. He had to fix his delicate relations with his girlfriend and his sMother. Like so many of the plot lines in these episodes, the season 2 premiere reminded me of a situation in my life. While there’s no single event that perfectly reflects what occurred in this episode, listening to my mom talk about her life and her experiences over the years has always made me really proud of what she’s accomplished and of who she is. Similar to Adam and Beverly, these feelings are usually expressed in actions rather than words, like when Beverly helped her snuggle monster win his girlfriend back with a spectacularly public laser redemption show starring Adam and Dana (and Beverly…). The point is that family will inevitably embarrass us at the most awkward times to be embarrassed, but they’ll also be there to bail us out when we need it the most.
Ask Barry, as he stood in front of the popular seniors with two bags of sandwiches gyro’s (sounds like) when his fully-clothed dad Murray came to the rescue whilst simultaneously busting his moron son for attempting to buy beer with a Fake ID.
Just Barry being Barry. Well, as Carlos Del Monaco actually.
Or ask me. After a girl I’d been dating for more than 2 months ended things with the devastating silent treatment, my mom responded by saying, “I think I’m going to have to go Beverly Goldberg on her ass.”
Mom, you’re an inspiration to me in so many ways!
Welcome back for your second season Goldbergs:
(Cinema Blend online)
Here’s to family!
Happy Throwback Thursday
As the weekend is fast approaching and since there was a totally awesome 2-hour Goldbergs marathon last night on ABC, it’s only right that Beverly Goldberg herself provide us all with a little guidance in the dancing department:
FYI – Beverly’s slow dance is known as, “The Snuggle Monster.”
Dancin’ on a Prayer
Spoiler Alert: This post contains scenes or content from the May 13, 2014 episode of The Goldbergs, the season finale.
The ’80s are officially back!
The hit freshman ABC sitcom The Goldbergs starring Wendi McLendon-Covey (Beverly), Jeff Garlin (Murray), Sean Giambrone (Adam), Hayley Orrantia (Erica), Troy Gentile (Barry), George Segal (Pops) and Patton Oswalt (Older Adam/Narrator) has been renewed for a full second season, moving to Wednesday nights at 9:30 p.m. this Fall.
Congratulations to everybody involved with The Goldbergs, most especially the creator of this pitch-perfect nostalgic treasure of a show Adam F. Goldberg! This news is pure awesomeness!
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We’ve all seen the cult classics that feature that legen-wait for it (sorry, wrong show) legendary house party set during high school. Pizza spinning like a record, impromptu, yet perfectly choreographed dancing scenes between high schoolers and the dream girl hanging-out across the room waiting for Prince Charming to emerge from the chaos of her immature classmates to prove his distinguishing worth.
And Big Tasty made sure this moment would be golden…with his thick gold chain necklace. But hey, it’s Barry, just go with it.
Reliving the “glory days” of our youth is usually cause for pause (Big Tasty isn’t the only one with fresh rhymes!), but not for Murray. The patriarch of the Goldbergs, would, only every so often, reveal insanely cool tidbits about his life that would shock his kids with priceless expressions and intrigue. Like that time he was in a plane crash, met Lou Reed while he was a waiter or the fact that he once made 70+ consecutive free throws back in high school.
No big deal.
Except when his wife Beverly finds out he was invited to his old high school to be celebrated for his tremendous accomplishment. She said yes, regardless of what Murray wanted to do. Murray rebutted, but this is Beverly Goldberg we’re talking about. So, what happened? Beverly prepared dinner for her snuggle monsters and they left the kids under the careful supervision of their cool grandpa, Pops.
What could go wrong?
After a disappointing year for Barry, who never got his crush to even learn his name (“Gustav? I’m not the foreign exchange student!”), he wanted to do something big…something that people (ie-Lexy Bloom) would never forget. Younger brother-with-a-video-camera Adam put it best, with nothing short of pure elation.
“This is my Risky Business.”
There’s just one thing about the past, which is that it’s sometimes hard to match with the realities of the present. In some cases, this reality can hit as embarrassingly flat as an air ball at the free throw line in front of everybody during a break at the big game after shooting granny style. Despite the fact that that shooting technique may have been popular back in the day (sure it was Murray…), it’s a tough fall from grace and past invincibility. What can be even tougher is trying to create those memories of glory in the present.
Enter Barry, with the help of Pops, Erica and the always wandering and analog-recording eye of Adam.
The party (sorry, the Sweater Party) reminded me of when I was just a few months into the experience of being a SigEp (Sigma Phi Epsilon) at college in the northeast during 2000-something, far from my home in Ohio. I was shy, basically only saying “here” at chapter meetings. There was a shortage of participants for the annual “Greek God and Goddess” competition.
I reluctantly volunteered.
Panicked, I had to think of a talent…Then, it hit me like the fully-loaded truck in this funny commercial I thankfully remembered. After recruiting two of my female friends from down the hall in my dorm and making them an offer they couldn’t and didn’t refuse, they agreed to join me for the performance of my life. During the day, before the performance, I called my Mom and told her what I was planning on doing. I was completely surprised at her response. She said, “Well, if you’re going to do it…then really shake it!”
After changing from my self-made toga, I was now walking up the stairs and onto the stage in front of the entire university Greek life with my two giggling backup dancers. I saw the shocked looks on my brothers’ faces, turned and waited for the music. Once the music started, I turned back to the audience in a tight pink tank top and a short pink skirt and mouthed the words, “let’s go girls.” Yes, I lip-synched and danced to Shania Twain’s empowering anthem “Man, I Feel Like a Woman.” An unexpected standing ovation later and everything had changed forever for the better. I could comfortably talk to girls, including one girl in particular that I had a crush on (who was one of my backup dancers…) like never before and had confidence like never before. And all it took was being random, goofy and dressing like a woman. Who knew?
Barry, who after being caught by his furious parents for throwing a massive party, gave a sincerely inspiring speech about his disappointing year. This convinced Murray to give him 10-minutes to live out his “glory days.” Mine and Barry’s dancing opened us both up to throw our instincts of embarrassment and fear out the window and to follow Bon Jovi’s words to just ‘live on a prayer’ and have fun.
“You’ve seen him run. He needs this.”
There are moments in life when the setting is perfect for letting loose and taking a shot. Barry finally got the genuine attention of Lexy Bloom by letting go of trying to impress her with cheesy lines by just being his carefree self in those glorious 10-minutes while wearing a fly, quintessentially ’80s Adidas track suit before being grounded for the summer with sweater dry cleaning duty (plus a kissing sesh with Erica’s BFF on the dance floor to make Lexy jealous!).
Sometimes, it doesn’t matter how we look when we take a shot in life, it’s just a matter of if we can get it in the hoop.
The Goldbergs: Season 2 is happening this Fall at 9:30 p.m. on Wednesday nights on ABC!
P.S. Let’s do this, ’80s style!
Jimmy's Daily Planet 