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The Cadence Decision
Spoiler Alert: Content from this blog entry is from the April 8, 2015 episode of The Goldbergs
“The technology ends here!”
During the 1980s, it was easy to believe such a statement as a wide-eyed teenager. There had never been inventions for music that could be held in one’s hands: the compact disc (CD) and the CD player.
(The Goldbergs Twitter)
(Maybe literally skipping around would prevent the CD from skipping songs?)
When Barry and Erica discovered the insanely amazing technological breakthrough in the mall one afternoon, there minds were blown! Their new life objective consisted of getting the insanely expensive entertainment system powered by CD’s into their house. Unfortunately, this candle in the wind was going to be blown out pretty quickly by Murray: the rocket man of no.
Meanwhile, Adam’s quest was to avoid snuggies at all costs on his undetermined birthday while in middle school in 1980s something. Always one step ahead, Beverly already planned the best birthday for her baby boy. Did this mean a surprise appearance by a clown with balloon animals? Of course not. Beverly would never do that for her child in middle school…
A slumber party manly sleepover with Adam’s two good friends and a future best bud involved ninja throwing stars, a pipe and a warm, non-fermented beer. Following a quick swig by each rebel, along with the most devastating liquid drop ever in the Goldbergs household by Adam, the partying quartet were forced to their lonely corners. In the literal sense, this meant each of them eating at nearby (yet separate) tables at lunch.
Shockingly though, the kids’ parents proved just how alike they were to each of their children in the subsequent meeting after the party disaster. After a 20-minute swear fest and time to reflect on the true “innocence” of their kids, Beverly led the eventual coming together of the parents. The end result was a weekly therapeutic card game where they relaxed, had fun and talked about how their little snuggle monkey drove them absolutely crazy. Beverly also hoped a stack of quarters for Adam’s birthday redo at the arcade with his friends would help. A requested tummy rub later and all was forgiven (plus, did you know that “bad apples make the best pies!”). And like any great quartet, the first breakup is inevitable. They just needed to find the right rhythm (and fully fermented beer).
Speaking of the right song, Barry and Erica made a deal with their dad that if they wrote the greatest song in history, Murray would buy them the entertainment system. Sadly (and completely unforeseen), Big Tasty’s rhymes were a little stale this week. Erica’s keyboard skills suffered a similar fate. The next best thing? Steal someone else’s song! Who better than Elton John. There’s no way Murray’s heard of him…
After failing to pass off an Elton John classic as their own, Pops suggested trying to understand their dad’s perspective. This led to the ever-so-popular “me gift.” It’s when you buy someone a gift, but it’s really meant for you. It was a bold move, but Murray’s reaction to “his” new entertainment system was even bolder. He forbid their use of it and declared his hip, exclusive of the magic technology.
And nothing says hip like mispronouncing Flavor Flav.
Despite his children wildly misinterpreting his childhood (well, lack of a childhood) because he had to care for his younger brother, Murray gave Barry and Erica some Philadelphia freedom by letting them use the entertainment system. Murray realized he needed to be more concerned and proud of giving his children what he didn’t have when he was their age. This was a genuinely powerful revelation for him. In this moment, Murray turned a very tense page in a chapter of his life and flipped into the chapter where he worked to help his kids achieve their dreams for their passions without drawing back to his own shortcomings.
It was his song to his kids.
A Tale of Two Halves
The first half was a disaster. The second half had its disastrous moments too, but it showed potential.
The Ohio State men’s basketball team lost at Louisville last night 64-55 as part of the established ACC/Big Ten Challenge late last night. After the first evening of games, the Big Ten is dominating the competition 6-2.
Yes, the Big Ten is still is a pretty good/awesome conference.
To say the first 20 minutes were difficult to watch as a Buckeye fan would be accurate. It looked like most everything, but basketball. Shooting awareness and concentration was near zero and Ohio State’s zone defense led to the zoning out of its defenders, which created open layups and three-point shots by the Cardinals. Conventional wisdom would typically dictate a 35-18 lead for Louisville, ranked #5 in America (hmm?) a comfortable second half and eventual victory.
It was anything but that.
After both teams played a sloppy first half, each had their moments again and again (and again) in the fast-paced second half. However, the difference was an energized and determined Buckeyes defense that caused turnover after turnover and fought off rebound after rebound to cut the deficit to as low as 5 points late in the game. Unfortunately for Thad Matta’s guys, missed open shots, a three pointer and free throws were the final bricks (ironic, right?) in the wall preventing a magnificently improbable come-from-behind win on the road.
There were a few positive moments from the game for Ohio State, but mostly, it was negative. The Ohio State team is old and young with 5 seniors and 5 freshman and a couple sophomores. This team just experienced its first true challenge against a quick, physical and talented opponent in a hostile environment on the road. OSU’s players were sloppy, disorganized, slow, unaware of their surroundings/tall shot blockers and not competent in running a set offensive or defensive system…until the second half. The defensive pressure was quintessential Thad Matta pressure, they countered well off of turnovers and they started to make some shots. The shooting still needs vast improvement, but it got better as the game went on. The intensity was undeniably impressive. Most of the starry-eyed freshman had their moments, but nothing spectacular. And then, whoa, there was the free throw line. Let me put it this way: free throws clearly aren’t free.
This may read as a harsh criticism of the Buckeyes. Good. They needed it for their own good.
Last night’s challenge was not against an elite high school basketball academy or the Sacred Heart Pioneers. The Louisville Cardinals were a difficult opponent and emblematic of what they’ll face throughout the Big Ten season (in some form or another), as well as in March Madness, if they make it. Matta does have that minimum 20-win season on his resume…But Jae’Sean Tate, Kam Williams and D’Angelo Russell (especially Russell) need to understand team basketball, relentless concentration and the highly-talented world of college hoops. The game moves more quickly than high school and if they keep running and shooting like it’s only about them, then that first half will be on an exhausting repeat like Groundhog Day all season long. Seniors Shannon Scott and Sam Thompson will also need to add consistency to their existing basketball arsenals. But this Ohio State team needed that ass whooping last night to wake them up to the realization of how top teams play and the virtues of hard work (ie – the necessary second half defense to avoid complete embarrassment). The current dynamics of this team include exciting flashes of raw talent, experienced guidance and athleticism and the yet-to-be-determined end result.
At bare minimum, Ohio State should first strive to be a hard-working team with speed, an overwhelming defense, consistent offensive and an unknown potential no team wants to risk facing if and when that single game elimination scenario comes up/is earned come March. That is a realistically attainable goal for this squad because the season has just barely begun. There’s plenty of time.
After that, anything is possible. For at least 40 minutes, the Buckeyes have now seen, experienced and felt what happens when they play lost. As strange as it sounds, viewers found out more about Ohio State than Louisville last night. Ohio State, however clumsily, nearly pulled off an impossible comeback with a warrior’s heart.
Hopefully, The Ohio State Buckeyes continue to play like they did in the second half, yet never forget that first half.
The Game of Life
Spoiler Alert: The following contains content from the November 12, 2014 episode of The Goldbergs
As determined as a ‘hungry, hungry hippo’ and as energetic as a teenage girl hanging-out with her friends talking, Barry Goldberg’s mission towards gaming superiority still may be stuck in the impossible.
Trivial Pursuit is the game and sister Erica his brainy nemesis. Honestly, knowing the author of “The Diary of Anne Frank” is tricky. Anyone could have missed that one…and by anyone, I mean only one: Barry Goldberg. Without the help of the JTP, he was left stranded on an island in the form of a kitchen table chair with nothing but his Big Tasty raps, ka-ra-tay moves and his confused concept of what sitting down means. Nostalgic board game nirvana aside, Barry’s only hope to defeat Erica for title of the smartest person in the world/between the two of them would require a measured approach to studying and preparation.
“I will do everything in my power to learn knowledge!”
While this intellectual battle between siblings brewed at the Goldergs’ kitchen table (under the careful supervision of bathroom break prone Pops), youngest child Adam was facing a ball of a time in gym class…literally. Red, rubber balls to be precise. The most gladiator-like gym class activity, dodge ball, is the pinnacle of survival for any young boy and girl.
True story.
After hearing about such a “barbaric” game, Beverly went into Beverly-mode: yes, Beverly Goldberg got dodge ball cancelled. But after a special isolation exercise by Mr. Mellor focused on Adam, the youngest Goldberg was struck square in the face with one of these balls of life. It left a red mark, which matched the fury of mama Beverly. We all know what happened next, following a slow-motion, fear-driven stroll through the halls of William Penn Academy. Beverly Goldberg not only cancelled dodge ball, but she also got Mr. Mellor fired.
It just got real…entertaining.
After Murray relieved Mr. Mellor from his inaccurate curb address number painting gig (“where’s the 3?”) and enlisting him to help him at his work, the uber-competitive gym teacher proved too intense for his laid-back job in the furniture store (self-high five). Plus, there were just too many bananas…way too many bananas in one drink.
Had Beverly gone too far?
Of course she did, that’s not even a serious question. But it was in the funniest way possible. Still, a gym teacher belongs in a gym, torturing young children with life lessons and sports cliches, rope climbs and world-class dodging. And sometimes that gym teacher who still doesn’t know your last name is pushing you so hard because he wants to instill some relentless toughness in you, preparing you to dodge life’s many unpredictable challenges that not even the all-powerful Beverly can deflect.
And after Erica beat Barry at his own game (literally, he made a game called, “Barrynopoly”), Barry was not only deflated about his surprising defeat, but he candidly disclosed his intellectual limitations to his older sister Erica.
It just got real…for real.
Contests and debates between siblings reveal a special bond, one that extends beyond normal competitive jousting. There’s an uncensored ruthlessness, all in good fun, with added realizations of what’s really at stake. Just don’t say the words, “Chinese checkers” around a particular sister of mine…But just as Erica cheated to ensure Barry got his much-needed victory at Trivial Pursuit (questions from the “junior edition” were discreetly used), so do all of us with siblings to one extent or another. This may include an older sister finally giving in and seeing and laughing at a movie in the theater she had previously refused to admit she enjoyed, just to spend some quality time with her younger brother and validate his choice in comedy. Or this may include going easy on a younger brother during a complex card game, to give him a much-needed win after a stressful week (then my oldest sister crushed me 3 times in a row, but still).
Even a gaming warrior needs to show some heart every once in a while. A true warrior is not only physically and intellectually formidable, but this person is also fully aware of his or her surroundings:
Like a 1980s music video, a warrior also knows how to take it over-the-top for the win!
Making an Early Impression
Kevin Spacey is a model citizen of the Darwinist theory of “survival of the fittest.” Actually, a more appropriate phrase for Mr. Spacey would be “survival of the funniest.” It’s perhaps common knowledge that people who are casual fans of the famed actor are aware of his skillful impressions. His most famous targets are Johnny Carson, Jack Lemmon and Christopher Walken. However, as the video below entertainingly illustrates, it was the impressions he performed off-stage that proved his best.
In so many ways, his old antics are what life is all about.
Who will you be this week?
Jimmy's Daily Planet 