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The True Colors of Bill (and) Murray
Spoiler Alert: Content from this blog post is from the May 6, 2015 episode of The Goldbergs
“I want my MTV!”
The ’80s were a glorious time, when music was forever transformed into a visual addiction for hours and hours of VHS-quality entertainment. Fortunately, Adam Goldberg figured out what made this groundbreaking art form such a success.
“A music video is one part thumping bass, one part big hair and one part animated dancing cat.”
Adam’s expertise as a pop culture savant and budding filmmaker came into play because Erica was bound and determined to make the perfect audition video for Juilliard. Since Juilliard was (and is) the best performing arts school in the country, her singing would have to be the best of the best…like Madonna good. And double fortunate for Erica was the fact that her smother mother Beverly would be right by her side throughout the entire process.
Beverly literally held up a fake Garfield puppet on Erica’s right side during her MTV music video-inspired audition tape. Clearly, nothing could go wrong here.
Murray, on the other hand, surprisingly discovered the one person who brings a smile to every man’s face: Bill Murray. Even more impressive (and comical) was that his enemy was named Bill and they were in the principal’s office when this “coincidence” about their names was revealed. Surely (“Don’t call me Shirley”), the writers were waiting for the right moment when they could premiere this episode with that title and storyline. Hopefully, the writers gave themselves well-deserved high-fives.
Bill and Murray soon became the best of friends, which led to watching TV together, eating Philly cheese steaks together, drinking beer together and napping on opposite sides of the couch together. Nothing could come between this electrically-charged adult bromance, except the one thing no men dare talk about under any circumstance:
Feelings…with tears.
Well, Bill/Murray was nice while it lasted.
As Erica and Beverly watched Adam’s raw editing magic, they immediately realized the Jenkintown Funk Academy may be more her speed. Despite glorious, but ultimately disastrous attempts by Adam to recreate iconic ’80s music videos (from A-ha to ZZ Top), Erica’s hopes at Juilliard were dashed. Devastated, she chose to think about her path to becoming a pop singing sensation, which led to a beautiful rendition of, “True Colors” by Cindi Lauper to end the episode. As this show does so perfectly, Erica’s singing provided the inspiring mood for Murray to hear Pops when he explained the true meaning of friendship in a heartfelt moment for the kings of the Goldberg castle.
This revelation further proved that Bill/Murray in any form will live forever, regardless of the quality of character impressions (looking at you Murray!).
The A-ha video (“Take on Me”) that Adam tried to recreate for Erica’s video is widely regarded as one of the best music videos and one-hit wonders of all-time. I can’t remember when I first saw it, but it was around Adam’s age in the early to mid-’90s and it remains one of my permanent impressions of the ’80s. I wanted to be in a world that was part real life-part pencil drawing. Spielberg movies, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Superman and Speed the movie (among many other influences), the music video below was a prime example of the excitement related to escapism into a new, fun place for a little while. This all helps frame our imaginations for the future, which is an eternally powerful force.
The Goldbergs is a weekly reminder of the awesomeness of the ’80s and all its funny life lessons involving family that helped shape its very enthusiastic fan base. The show’s viewers thoroughly enjoy the nostalgic trip down memory lane to a world that borders between real life and a wonderfully exaggerated picture of the past.
A-ha, got it.
A is for “As You Wish”
Spoiler Alert: Content from this blog entry was featured in the April 22, 2015 episode of The Goldbergs
(The Goldbergs Twitter)
During the summer in 1991, The Rocketeer flew into our imaginations with rocket-fueled fun (don’t forget about the gum). To a six-year-old, it was a spectacular time to be alive. What was better than the idea of flying like Superman, without needing Kryptonian genetics, through the skies to save the world?
The answer was nothing.
Mesmerized, I took it upon myself to scrounge through my very own tool shed/kitchen drawers to find the necessary pieces to build my own personal flying machine. With an old garage door opener in hand, I was one click away from soaring to unknown heights and adventure! This enthusiasm was shared by Adam Goldberg in last night’s episode, except his cinematic obsession was the cult favorite, The Princess Bride. Specifically, it was the film’s famous sword fight that drew him in. Fought on a dramatically set cliff, the battle was intense and immensely entertaining. And the dialogue was surprisingly equitable and conversational.
Another battle fought on a cliff of sorts was between Adam and Murray, underscored by a jockeying of similar interests and ulterior motives. Using Westley-level charm, Adam convinced his stingy dad to buy him two fencing swords to practice in his “pursuit” of becoming a future Olympic champion. Unfortunately, the overly dramatic hijinks in The Princess Bride were no match for Murray, who saw right through his son’s grand manipulation. It also didn’t help that immediately after quitting fencing, Adam was sword fighting Dave Kim in his basement in full Princess Bride gear.
Plus, stabbing your father in the neck rarely helps anything.
Meanwhile, Beverly was busy being a yenta hell-bent on cross-fitting athletics with music. The result was the sweet sound of faculty romance (and kissing at school). The only downside was ruining Barry and Erica’s lives. Oh, and can’t forget about altering the stable career path of a certain music teacher. Besides that, this social experiment was a rousing success.
In order to fix everything, Beverly had to match up the unmatchable, romantically bitter teacher in his brown clothing from head -to-toe. But if this series has taught us anything, it’s that there are three words that inspire the greatest from Beverly Goldberg:
“Can’t be done.”
Back to Adam, he would need magic that could only be found in one place. The question was whether Murray would play along. This situation called for both sides to realize to be bigger than their own self-interests, no matter how embarrassing. Adam discovered his fencing inspiration from The Princess Bride for his fencing battle in front of a large crowd at school, including his dad and grandfather sitting front row center. And would you believe it? Embodying the goofy personalities from a movie led to an unexpected point for the swordsman-in-training. And in perfect harmony with his son, Murray literally embodied a giant character’s clothes (André, to be precise) from The Princess Bride movie for a scene of bonding with his youngest son and his friends after the match.
One of Adam’s dreams came true: His father understood the importance of an influential movie in his life.
You could say it was an inconceivable reality.
Whilst engaging in misguided hilarity, Beverly did manage to match the unmatchable with a little help from a future yenta. Erica couldn’t fight it, she has meddling DNA. In this instance, Beverly’s excitement nearly reached the adrenaline level achieved at a Jazzercise session.
This episode beautifully revealed that no matter how much we may resist things that we swear to ourselves are foolish and/or ridiculous, we are uncontrollably drawn to the foolish and ridiculous because, despite all logical reasoning, we know deep down that wishes are meant to come true.
Sometimes, all it takes is clicking play on a VCR…or an old garage door opener.
Just Say Yes to America’s Funniest Family
Spoiler Alert: Content from this blog entry is from the April 15, 2015 episode of The Goldbergs
“Son, you are no longer a moron. You are a man.”
Last night, The Goldbergs gave its fans treinta minutos extra (that’s “30 extra minutes” for Adam Goldberg-level Spanish speakers) in a 2-episode feature. In dealing with this new, altered reality, the major highlights of both shows will be intertwined in a creative way…
I can relate to the Goldberg family in countless ways, but Adam in particular. And his titanic struggles with Spanish was like a play-by-play from my life, except for dressing up as a bullfighter and making guacamole in class (well played, Beverly). Full disclosure: we all had one subject that was just never going to happen, no matter what.
It was like, “No way, José!”
For me, like Adam, my least proficient subject was Spanish. Basically, it was all about survival. Pass and move on. And, whenever possible, pray for a teacher that was merciful in her grading. I never received special treatment for any of my profound proclamations, even when I conjured up such enlightening revelations as, “Donde esta la biblioteca?” However, Adam’s Smother, Beverly, was very good friends with Alexander Hamilton and his many, many twin brothers…
Beverly’s tactics became a forbidden dance involving Adam’s Spanish teacher in more ways than one, two steps to the right and dip!
And on the other side of town, Barry was exercising his gladiator skills. This involved heroic obstacles, such as balancing on an ottoman whilst getting hit in the head with two pillows taped to both ends of a stick with a helmet on, dodging zero tennis balls and failing to deliver a record-breaking number of pizzas in one evening…as in a crazy high number…it was 33! Fortunately for Barry, his old man could relate to his struggles as a first-time teenage worker and even had a cold brewsky waiting for his oldest son when he got home to share with him. Unfortunately for Murray, the beer company failed to print a warning label about not slapping the beer across the room out of nervousness.
Some people don’t need to drink a beer to feel its effects.
Perhaps Barry was subconsciously restraining himself while he trained for his audition video for “American Gladiators,” one of the greatest shows ever. Literally! Lucky for him, his trusty younger brother Adam was fully-equipped with a video camera and sick editing tricks. Now, would Adam use his tricks for good or for evil?
(Hint: Bob Saget was involved…)
Whenever confronting two evils, politics cannot be too far behind. For the Goldbergs household, it got personal. The presidential election with Reagan v. Mondale evolved into Nancy Reagan v. Geraldine Ferraro that really became Beverly v. Erica. Predicting what issues are important to voters can be impossible to anticipate and this was clearly revealed between newly political Erica and her priority opposite mother. “Just Say No” turned into a search and seizure of polarized opinions within the family.
Since last night was special and featured 2-episodes, how about an original lyrical poem written in the spirit of the Rapping King of the Goldberg household to summarize the night’s events:
Big Tasty here, and you wanna know what’s up?
when I see a beer, I just slap-that-cup!
My little bro is helping me out, flexing my muscles,
“American Gladiators” watch out, ’cause I ‘just say no’ to snuggles
Pops is around, always ready with sage advice,
except when I’m chillin’ in my new chair watching “Miami Vice”
It seems the fam is getting political, talkin’ about taxes,
I don’t wanna hear it because I’ve gotta go practice
But Erica said Mondale, Mom and Dad said Reagan,
set in their corners, they each think the other is mistaken
Pizza delivery wasn’t meant for me, there were just too many calls,
now Adam can resume hitting me with bright yellow balls!
Gotta get tough, the JTP needs me, we’re the Dream Team,
but a rival crew just booped my nose with a dollop of ice cream
Mom realized her baby boy isn’t perfect and replied with a, “que?”
“Tengo problemas y necesito ayuda” is what Adam wished he could say
Dad crossed into my sister’s universe and it was a mess,
he told Erica he was proud of her, speaking with fatherly finesse
She didn’t get the beer, but she definitely knew,
what it meant for them to almost share a brew
Adam and I had a tennis racket-to-chest and a heart-to-heart,
and in the end, we learned we never wanted to be apart
I was embarrassed on national TV, yet with a chance at prize money,
but hey, that’s just life with my family, which I guess is pretty funny
Like Reagan in ’84, The Goldbergs is a landslide win.
The Cadence Decision
Spoiler Alert: Content from this blog entry is from the April 8, 2015 episode of The Goldbergs
“The technology ends here!”
During the 1980s, it was easy to believe such a statement as a wide-eyed teenager. There had never been inventions for music that could be held in one’s hands: the compact disc (CD) and the CD player.
(The Goldbergs Twitter)
(Maybe literally skipping around would prevent the CD from skipping songs?)
When Barry and Erica discovered the insanely amazing technological breakthrough in the mall one afternoon, there minds were blown! Their new life objective consisted of getting the insanely expensive entertainment system powered by CD’s into their house. Unfortunately, this candle in the wind was going to be blown out pretty quickly by Murray: the rocket man of no.
Meanwhile, Adam’s quest was to avoid snuggies at all costs on his undetermined birthday while in middle school in 1980s something. Always one step ahead, Beverly already planned the best birthday for her baby boy. Did this mean a surprise appearance by a clown with balloon animals? Of course not. Beverly would never do that for her child in middle school…
A slumber party manly sleepover with Adam’s two good friends and a future best bud involved ninja throwing stars, a pipe and a warm, non-fermented beer. Following a quick swig by each rebel, along with the most devastating liquid drop ever in the Goldbergs household by Adam, the partying quartet were forced to their lonely corners. In the literal sense, this meant each of them eating at nearby (yet separate) tables at lunch.
Shockingly though, the kids’ parents proved just how alike they were to each of their children in the subsequent meeting after the party disaster. After a 20-minute swear fest and time to reflect on the true “innocence” of their kids, Beverly led the eventual coming together of the parents. The end result was a weekly therapeutic card game where they relaxed, had fun and talked about how their little snuggle monkey drove them absolutely crazy. Beverly also hoped a stack of quarters for Adam’s birthday redo at the arcade with his friends would help. A requested tummy rub later and all was forgiven (plus, did you know that “bad apples make the best pies!”). And like any great quartet, the first breakup is inevitable. They just needed to find the right rhythm (and fully fermented beer).
Speaking of the right song, Barry and Erica made a deal with their dad that if they wrote the greatest song in history, Murray would buy them the entertainment system. Sadly (and completely unforeseen), Big Tasty’s rhymes were a little stale this week. Erica’s keyboard skills suffered a similar fate. The next best thing? Steal someone else’s song! Who better than Elton John. There’s no way Murray’s heard of him…
After failing to pass off an Elton John classic as their own, Pops suggested trying to understand their dad’s perspective. This led to the ever-so-popular “me gift.” It’s when you buy someone a gift, but it’s really meant for you. It was a bold move, but Murray’s reaction to “his” new entertainment system was even bolder. He forbid their use of it and declared his hip, exclusive of the magic technology.
And nothing says hip like mispronouncing Flavor Flav.
Despite his children wildly misinterpreting his childhood (well, lack of a childhood) because he had to care for his younger brother, Murray gave Barry and Erica some Philadelphia freedom by letting them use the entertainment system. Murray realized he needed to be more concerned and proud of giving his children what he didn’t have when he was their age. This was a genuinely powerful revelation for him. In this moment, Murray turned a very tense page in a chapter of his life and flipped into the chapter where he worked to help his kids achieve their dreams for their passions without drawing back to his own shortcomings.
It was his song to his kids.
Jimmy's Daily Planet 